March 15, 2015

35 Today! God Is Good...


Here I am folks, another year, another birthday. A year older, hopefully a year wiser. I was just looking over at my year and it looked packed.  As I've reflected on all that happened, my heart has caught up with my head and I'm so thankful. Just thankful. God is so good. He always is. Over the past years as a parent and an adult, there were times I'd start to feel as if I would just get past one obstacle to find another staring at me right in the face. Some of them weren't too difficult to overcome,  however some others would cause me to wonder how I'd ever get past them. And day to day, as God performs miracles in our lives, we are surviving, living, and most times thriving. The hard times also helped me come to the realization that good things often come hand in hand with the bad. Despite the trying times I came to be happier now than at any other time in my life, not to mention more sure of myself and contented. 

"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." ~ Philippians 4:12-13

...I love this passage. It speaks true to my life. Contentment is one's choice to live in peace. It’s a lifelong journey for me that requires regular self examination and an ongoing process of making peace with my self and to the things I have no control of. As long as I have the basic in my life, which to me is, my family and friends, my husband and Yllac, having food on our table and a home to keep us safe, (and internet of course!) and to extend that to treating the people around me with I think that covers it. While I hope for a better me, for now I am fulfilled with every single blessing in my life. 

This morning I woke up with a slight pain on my back. More white hair on my head and bags under my eyes. I am 35. I bought a hair dye last weekend and i promise myself to sleep early. Jayson hugged me so ever tight and kissed me like he's never kissed me before and pinched my butt just enough and called me sexy. I haven't brushed yet. Yllac sang me half of the happy birthday song while he ate his breakfast. He kissed me and said, "hug mama." A few minutes later my parents,  and my brother's family were on skype. They sang me a happy birthday. Half jokingly my brother said, "Ate, you're awake now at 5 in the morning?", and he laughed. He could not believe it. Neither do i. We've known each other since birth and i miss him so much. After saying goodbye, by six in the morning, Jayson and Yllac were out on the door and on the way to the school and office, and I am alone to finish what's left of my breakfast. And in silence i say a little prayer of protection for my boys and loved ones. God knows they are my life. I live for them. They are one of the many purposes of my life. They made me so happy. My favorite part of the day is to wake up and have breakfast together in our tiny home and go back home with them after the long hours of work. My life is simple, uncomplicated, not without a challenge, never perfect. I thank God for everything, for my life, for another year, another chance to create memories, to love more, chance to develop more friends, to continue to hope,  to forgive, to work harder, and to give back. 

Yay! Happy birthday to me. 

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