5 Years

Exactly 5 years ago, I kissed him.

Ch ch ch ch ch ch Changes

This is long...I miss him. 

I really HATE it (before and now) when people say to me things are gonna change between you and Jayson once you get married. Blame it on Judith McNaught but i believe in fairy tales and happily ever after. With all my heart I prayed for that one perfect man for me. God listened to me and he gave me Jayson, whom I knew since high school. Then after two years of dating we  decided to get married. I may sound unreal but he hasn't changed a bit. 

For the past weeks now, am having this weird waking up hours, like three or four in the morning and am just so hungry. Am not sure what to call that marriage connection but once i wake up, minutes later he'll be awake too, then he'll automatically massage my back and my hips with his eyes still closed. And after a while he'll ask me, "gugutom ka?" (are you hungry?). Id nod and still half asleep he'll get me a sandwich or a fruit. He'll go back to sleep while am eating while his foot giving me a leg massage. 

He's always been that way. Always there for me. Even before we got pregnant, he almost always does everything for me, which sometimes I feel bad cos I can't do anything without him anymore. He knows everything I need even before i asked for it. And every day I thank God for him. He is my best. I don't know anything about marriage and how to make it last, but I guess the only secret to a marriage is to think of your husband as the most wonderful person in the world, and your wife the best woman in the world and NO ONE ELSE.  That happiness and love is real when you're together. And literally you cannot live without each other.  

Marriage is a good thing. It unites you and makes you official, but certainly did not change our relationship. It gave us even more freedom to grow, to make decisions, and to somehow understand together the complicated circumstances we encounter as we go on. I like the fact that we're already planning our trips twenty years from now. My husband is a dreamer. And Id like to listen to his fantasies and imaginations. It makes me continue to hope for all the things we want in life. 

Realistically speaking I know things are already changing. One for certain is his hair. But I think he's still suuuper cute. Since Koffy inherited his looks already, I wish our baby would look like him too. Why? Cos I wanted to be constantly reminded of how God is so good to me.

We're gonna be parents this December. And that is the kind of change I desperately want. Am grateful it's finally happening.

Will You Still Feed Me When am 64?

"There is no greater risk than matrimony. But there is nothing happier than a happy marriage" 

- Benjamin Disraeli

I believe in love, I believe in marriage. I believe in the union of two individuals making one life and finding happiness, joy, love, comfort, security and future with one another. I've been married with this man for more than 2 years now and we've been together for five years since 2005. I love this man.

I was hospitalized for 3 days since the beginning of the week for dehydration and not to worry cos the baby's fine and healthy. I never asked my husband how much he loves me, and this week made me realize I don't have to ask at all. He answered me with back rubs, by feeding me and making sure I was never alone. He loves me.

You see, I've been living alone since I was 21 and my life with him have been the best-est of all. It's so scary to think we were in love back then, compared to what we have now, that was just crazy talk.

......

Dear husband,

This song is for you. I want you to know that i love being married to you cos I know there's always someone special I can annoy for the rest of my life. 

Yours forever, 

"Maria Wrestlemania"

Mirror Cleaners

My dear kept man, Mr. Lozada. I am not secretive, just protective.

Have a great day everyone!

I Must Have Done Something Good

Perhaps i had a wicked childhood
Perhaps i had a miserable youth
But somewhere in my wicked, miserable past
...there must have been a moment of truth

Cos here you are standing there loving me
...whether or not you should
Cos somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good

Nothing comes from nothing
Nothing ever could

So somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good

• Do you believe in Angels? I do! I married one. hihihihi.
  
• And i quote Ana B. of the blog On Dressing Up, "Oh Denise! You are a total beach babe. Your blue suit is perfect against the blue sky and blue water. Your husband makes you and the Philippines look utterly gorgeous." ----and i died! Oh yes indeed. hihihi. Ana, and to all our friends here, thank you so much for the appreciation of my husband's take on me and on the Philippines. He really does not want to be featured here. I guess in blogging there's so much risk in putting yourself out there, so i wanna keep people, things and personal stories within the privacy of my little world. But sometimes i really just can't help it. I know if he reads this, he'll be a little awkward and undeniably cute grasping what i have written, and am sorry cos he really doesn't want this. But "i love you" isn't enough , it's so generic don't you think?, so am lashing out here. ihihihih. Sweet lashing aylavet!
  
• Something good is my i love you song for him. The Sound of music has been an inspiration for me growing up. I know all the songs and dialogue. Well am assuming you know the movie right? Every civilized person on Earth has known or have heard of it and if you haven't ...well hello Martian it's time to see the movie. hihihihihi.
  

weeeehihihihihihi!
this is my most fave photo of him.
He'll hate me for posting this, but oh well i can always ask for his forgiveness. hihihihi.
he loves meeeeee. c",)